Swinging, Ethical Non Monogamy, Polyamory, Group Sex, Threesome, Foursomes, Orgies, Demisexuality, Bisexuality, and the Effects on a Long Term Relationship

We’ve all felt it, that surge, that urge, that attraction to someone that may not be our partner and the desire to act on what might be considered cheating. Some of us are better at tabling that desire, while others of us either can make the choice to discuss it with our partners, or cheat on them.

For me cheating fully hasn’t really been an option, I’ve made out with someone that I didn’t have permission to, but I immediately when home and told my partner of 8 years. But he knew to expect this kind of behavior from me because I’ve discussed it before. When they say til death do us part and I’ll never love another, I don’t necessarily find those words resonating with me. I can maybe commit to loving at least one person for a long time, maybe forever, but only having sex with only them for the rest of my life sounds like a terrible idea.

About a year after I started dating, when I was 16, I desperately felt an urge to add a person to our relationship. Maybe it was because I was bi, I had a boyfriend, but I didn’t have a girlfriend. And I wanted one. This was well before I’d head of non monogamy or poly was a buzzword, this was close to 15 years ago and I just knew that if I was only going to be with this guy I wasn’t going to be thrilled about it (even though in my 15 year old mind I was helplessly in love and wanted to marry…